The power of your own psyche, the authority of your own psyche, has brought you easily, with majestic ease, into the life that you know. When you were a fetus, you did not question ‘Where am I? Where am I going?’ You exalted in the fantastic vitality of your being.
I tell you then, now, to listen to the authority of your psyche - of your being! To listen to the voices that you remember when you were children. The voices that spoke to you as you fell off to sleep. I ask you to recapture the courage and joy and expansion you felt as children - when each new day was a miracle to be explored, and there were no authorities to tell you how to explore it.
Even your parents were but guides, that had nothing to do with the reality of you in relationship to the day, or a flower, or a raindrop.
I ask you only to rediscover your wonder. To look, even at the world that you know, from a different viewpoint, where there are no authorities but the joy and authority of your being; where time is not separated into moments; where you waken each moment as you did when you were a child - each moment a new birth, a new fantastic reality in which you had your place and your part to play; where the miracles were your own, and rose from the fantastic joy of your own being. That is what I ask you to do - to recapture those moments that existed before you were educated.
When two people are ‘in love,’ people commonly say that they are ‘more than just friends.’ But in the long run, they seem to treat each other as less than friends. Most people think that being ‘in love’ is a much more intimate, much more ‘meaningful,’ relationship than ‘mere’ friendship. Why, then, do couples refuse each other the selfless love, the kindness and good will, that they readily give to their friends? People can’t ask of their friends that they carry all their projections, be scapegoats for all their moods, keep them feeling happy, and make life complete for them. Why do couples impose these demands on each other? Because the cult of romance teaches us that we have the right to expect that all our projections will be borne—all our desires satisfied, and all our fantasies made to come true—in the person we are ‘in love’ with. In one of the Hindu rites of marriage, the bride and groom make to each other a solemn statement: ‘You will be my best friend.’ Western couples need to learn to be friends, to live with each other in a spirit of friendship, to take the quality of friendship as a guide through the tangles we have made of love.
Robert A. Johnson, “We: Understanding the Psychology of Romantic Love”
Ultimately, happiness comes down to choosing between the discomfort of becoming aware of your mental afflictions and the discomfort of being ruled by them.
~ Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche
Every day we slaughter our finest impulses. That is why we get a heart-ache when we read those lines written by the hand of a master and recognize them as our own, as the tender shoots which we stifled because we lacked the faith to believe in our own powers, our own criterion of truth and beauty. Every man, when he gets quiet, when he becomes desperately honest with himself, is capable of uttering profound truths. We all derive from the same source. There is no mystery about the origin of things. We are all part of creation, all kings, all poets, all musicians; we have only to open up, to discover what is already there.
You have a choice in life: You can either strive to be perfect or you can strive to be whole. If you strive to be whole, you have to surrender to your process. You have to surrender to the seasons of your psyche. You have to realize that allowing yourself to be depressed, tired and totally uninspired is the ultimate trust in the universe.
We waste so much energy trying to cover up who we are
When beneath every attitude is the want to be loved
And beneath every anger is a wound to be healed
And beneath every sadness is the fear that there will not be enough time
When we hesitate in being direct we unknowingly slip something on, some added layer of protection
That keeps us from feeling the world
And often that thin covering is the beginning of a loneliness
Which if not put down diminishes our chances for joy
It’s like wearing gloves every time we touch something
And then forgetting we chose to put them on
We complain that nothing feels quite real
In this way our challenge each day is not to get dressed to face the world
But to unglove ourselves
So that the doorknob feels cold
And the car handle feels wet
And the kiss good-bye feels like the lips of another being
Soft and unrepeatable